Monday, December 28, 2015

Affirmations for 2016

Happy New Year!

As a common cultural practice, we often make ourselves promises every new year of things we plan to do better. These resolutions commonly reflect our inner dreams, social needs, or areas that need improvement. However, most people fall short of reaching these aspirations for several reasons: time, patience, commitment, and money.

Affirmations are kind of like resolutions except they are made daily. They have a 90% chance of being implemented because they are a form of a daily reminder a person says to the self first thing every morning while looking in the mirror at his or her reflection and the last thing each evening before going to bed.

So how does one make an affirmation?  I suggest you get some index cards about the size of your hand. On each card, write one positive affirmation in your favorite color of pen saying something like the following:

I am in shape.
I am thinking clearly.
I am staying on task.
I am a loyal person.
I am beautiful.
I am positive.
I am a great friend.
I am a great mother.
I love my __________.

Remember: Say your affirmation(s) every morning upon waking up while looking in the mirror. Repeat the process right before you go to bed.

The simpler the wording is, the better. We say, "I am" because it tells the subconscious mind that this statement is already true. What we are doing in fact is reprogramming the subconscious mind to start thinking in a positive progressive way. When we truly believe something is possible, we automatically start behaving in ways that lead to the desired outcome.

As humans, most of us are prone to negative self talk. And this self-talk is the very thing that often hinders us from reaching our goals. It is not a matter of will power but belief power. Who doesn't want success and great love in their lives? But how many of us truly believe we are worthy or capable of all the great things we aspire to bring or develop in our lives?

Of course, faith and prayer help a lot too. But prayer alone is not enough.  I know dozens of Christians who pray nonstop but nothing ever changes in their lives because they refuse to take any action. The Christian God requires action and walking in faith. (Be doers not sayers-paraphrased)

Make a new goal for 2015 and replace empty unfocused resolutions with positive affirmations.

Write and share your affirmations with me. I'd love to hear to hear about them.

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Introducing Charlie McGillicuddy LLC (

We live in an ultra competitive world. While some seem to thrive in it, others struggle to find their footing in an ever shifting, hard to understand employment sector.

In spite of many laws to try to protect against discrimination, we know it still exists. It is well documented that many companies start laying people off once they get to be middle aged, often replacing them with younger workers at a substantial reduction in salary, as they are "newbies".

Sadly, just about anyone can find some research study or statistics to twist to prove whatever point he or she is trying to get readers to believe. I teach a different strategy and approach to employment and job hunting.

A couple of years ago, a fusion took place between my friend and mentor, Charlie, and my ideology.

There exist literally hundreds of online and in person job and life coaches that seem to promise potential clients the sun, moon, and stars. They incorporate pop psychology, positive thinking and affirmations, and the ever-popular trending ideas that exist in society. When these are more closely analyzed, they are really nothing new but are the regurgitated ideas that can be traced back to the main fore fathers of fortune 500/business/motivational coaching.  While this information is good, it is often severely overpriced. Many clients roam between the various coaches taking all of their seminars, lectures, buying their CD's and books, and they seem to never break out of their given problem or cycles of bad fortune or misplacement in the work force. One of my closest friends actually has attended over 100 retreats and seminars from over a dozen of these motivational speakers and writers, spending well over $15,000 yet nothing has changed in his life or job situation.

Charlie and I were discussing this particular friend of mine and then we reached a decision. "There needs to be an individualized coaching service that really dissects each client's situation, personality, and the other factors in their specific field and then helps them to strengthen their weak areas and really learn how to interview." One size does not fit all in interview coaching.

Our research took us to many job interviewing web sites that were like a jungle to navigate. Buy these practice questions! Read this! Buy this! Try this! It was actually nightmarish trying to make sense of their websites and personal promotion of themselves. They were all job experts! They were all the best! We soon realized we would have to start from scratch to figure out the best way of helping potential clients.

After a year of field research and giving out hundreds of pro bono job coaching hours across many professional fields including business, engineering, science, law, academia, and medicine, we both realized there needed to be the following things present to truly help a job seeker succeed:

1) An understanding of the field he/she was trying to get employed in, especially specific companies and jobs that interested him/her.
2) An evaluation of the background, experience, skill set, and education and then showcasing the client’s strengths in his or her application, interviewing questions, and overall online presence;
3) A personality evaluation;
4) Personalized job coaching and job interviewing strategy built around THE client’s own unique needs, background, work field, and position sought;
5) Ongoing research in the contemporary job interviewing strategies used by corporations around the world including the psychology and profiling methods utilized.

So instead of trying to sell a client a pre-boxed set of IDEAS or a CULT personality behind the coaching, we decided to create the potential for a better and improved version of HIMSELF OR HERSELF that can be evolved and developed through the individualized process we have designed.

That is what Charlie McGillicuddy LLC is all about. 

Check it out at

No gimmicks. No catch phrases. No cult personalities. No feel good propaganda. 


Tuesday, September 29, 2015

The Why of Self Development

Can you even imagine belonging to a religious organization that down plays the importance of self-development? Neither can I but sadly, that was my scenario for many years.
Apparently the idea was “as we are told to look toward God, there remains nothing left of us but all of Him.” While this may sound metaphorically nice, the reality is God *YHWH is creating a UNIQUE creation in all of us. A long time ago I wrote a not very popular article called "Yellow Pencils are Us". As an early piece of my writing, it had a few grammatical errors in it, but as I have evolved as a writer I have improved in all areas. Why would a writer write as badly as they did twenty years ago? Who can proudly claim they have not improved with time? Members of certain churches I personally know seem to take great pride in doing absolutely nothing professionally and proudly bragging how they live off of the church and government. I find these souls the greatest embarrassment to both my faith and to the Creator God.
       The basis of self-development is that we learn from our mistakes and improve in our performance in all areas. If self-development is so bad, why on earth would we have the cognitive ability to analyze and study things? A newborn baby is born with a blank slate mentally. It must learn to speak and literally do everything. If we were not supposed to evolve and develop over the course of our lifetimes, we would have been born with full knowledge and instinct much like some of the lower life forms. But that is not the case. We were created to EVOLVE and DEVELOPMENT mentally.
We were created to learn. Stagnant waters rot and mold. And all life therein dies. A life that is not developed stagnates and the mind literally rots. Have you ever wondered why mental illness is at an all-time high in Western society?
Jesus Christ died for our sins. That opens up the door to eternal life. However, we have an entire life here on earth to develop both spiritually and physically. Spiritual development is something different from physical development although the fruits or curses of our spiritual development definitely effect our physical bodies and lives DEPENDING ON THE CHOICES MADE AND APPLICATION OF LESSONS LEARNED.
 Our physical development includes mental skills, physical performance, and professional skills that can get us employment or generate a skill set that people will pay us to perform for them. There is something seriously wrong with an able bodied person who can't figure out how to get a job or be able to feed him or herself. I blame the religious institutions directly for this curse we find in America right now. How many churches advocate work development? financial responsibility? professional development?
Minion makers have no desire to create superstars and kings: pay, stay, pray, and obey. One such corporate church actually issued this command a few years ago. Minions are easy to control and they faithfully give 10, 20 or 30% or even more of their income to the church leaders that they in turn use to preach the gospel but sadly, most of this profit is used to travel internationally and pay very large salaries to men who otherwise, probably could not find employment in contemporary society. I'm not against your church or having a paid minister, but I am against any church that holds its members back and tries to control their personal lives: whether this is limiting the educational opportunities, the kinds of jobs allowed to perform, gender suppression (in my 20's I was told I shouldn't be in music school and instead I should be preparing to be a good wife and mother), and otherwise. Churches need to stay OUT OF THE professional lives of their members and OUT OF THEIR bank accounts. If your church controls in ANY way it is time to find another church. Trust me, your future self will thank you and your Creator will applaud.
God wants you to develop. He wants you to learn from life and to become the best you that you can be. He wants you to choose a good profession that can adequately support you in all ways and allow you to live where you desire. He wants you to continually think new thoughts and find better ways of doing things. He wants you to teach others what you have learned. Yes, he wants to be the center of your life but He doesn't want you to use HIM as an excuse to stop developing. Actually this is the greatest insult you can give a stop becoming what he is trying to persuade you to become! God does not create minions. He creates masterpieces. And human development into the future spirit beings that will compose his ultimate family in the future Kingdom of God demands that people LEARN from life, CHOOSE the better things in life, and BECOME what they choose to become while using their talents, and DEVELOPING their minds and talents as they are so inspired.
I believe God blesses those who try. I believe those who simply pray and take no action will never get true answers or results to their prayers because quite frankly, they are LAZY. Why would God bring food to an able bodied person who refuses to work, hunt, or garden in order to feed themselves? Walking in faith does not mean walking in stupidity. The Bible is full of examples of DOERS, MOVERS, AND SHAKERS.  Even the poorest were expected to glean the edges of harvested fields to collect their own grains that they then would grind and make into flour and then bake into bread (See the book of Ruth). Did God ever just drop bread in their laps (excluding the miraculous manna incident while Israel was wondering in the desert: a people so stubborn and so stupid God allowed them to march in circles until they learned obedience).  This is the year 2015. Education for almost every subject in the universe is available free through books borrowed from the public library or online through various free videos and classes. There is absolutely no excuse not to self-development.
We must self-development for these reasons: a) to become what God wants us to become b) to be able to get the best job possible c) to be able to constantly add new and exciting fixtures to our  lives d) not to mentally stagnate and develop emotional and mental problems, e) to teach and help others improve their lives. And f) to fully enjoy and use the life we have been given.
Take control of your life and learn something new today. Self-evaluate your life and decide if you need further career training or academic enhancement to do what you really want to do and enjoy doing professionally. Get empowered, make new choices, and start self-developing TODAY.

Sunday, August 2, 2015

Genetics versus Environment in Behaviorism

Behaviorism is influenced by many cultural contributions anthropologically speaking including upbringing (kinship system and family relationships), religion, political environment, economical resources, and other environmental contributions such as musical and educational influences. 

In this pop psychological world we currently reside in, in the Western World there has been an overindulging in focusing on genetic and DNA influences on behavior and more specifically, BAD behaviors and supposed addictions. Some leading experts are even starting to blame bad attitudes, laziness, and sexual behaviors on genetic inheritance.

Environment and Genetics both have influence on humanity. However, as I've always believed, it is about a 50/50 split. While a human may be predisposed to certain weaknesses, DNA is not a blueprint for concrete life long behavior and outcome. Behavior is a result of choice. While there may be some natural inclinations preprogrammed via DNA and environmentally learned, the individual still has the power over both his or her mind and body. CHOICE is what fuels our world. And choice comes with self-responsibility. That seems to really frighten socialists who believe we can throw money at poverty and it will magically go away. Poverty will be eradicated when every individuals takes full responsibility for self. 

However, for some it is easier to believe they "can't help" something because change is a scary thing. Imagine a person who was raised in poverty; which behavior is the easiest to follow: a) to sit on the sofa watching TV all day and collect welfare or b) bust his or her butt and work 2-3 jobs while putting the self through night school to finish a college degree? 

I believe any life can be self-changed. It can be molded, repaired, recast, or evolved in any direction the mind chooses. The brain is the most powerful machine on the planet. As a super computer, its synapses can rewire themselves SIMPLY BY THE POWER OF THOUGHT. That is truly the basis of all forms of self-development: to change the mind changes the behavior, which changes the outcome. This is actually a far better definition of social evolution: "self evolution".

For the religious, often they cripple themselves by falsely believing all their Creator expects of them is to pray about an issue and take zero action. I call these doctrine "poverty is a blessing" Sadly, I know hundreds of certain sect Christians who can't even feed themselves because they truly believe God is anti education, anti self development, and anti prosperity. "Poverty is a blessing" is one of the most horrific belief systems I can imagine. In speaking about the Great God who gave Solomon great wisdom along with great wealth and power, it is false to its very core. Poverty is not a blessing from God.

Environmental episodes throughout life can have crippling effects on some people. They tend to get into these cycles of self-pity, failure, and like a broken record, keep replaying the early life "programming" they received. The mind functions very much like a computer. Input in, behavior output out. Only by changing the "programming" can a person alter  his or her life. It is possible. It may  not be easy but ANYTHING is possible where there is a will.

Genetics is something a little beyond our control at this time in history. While there may be things that can cause an inclination to addictions, by studying one's ancestors and knowing what weaknesses lie there in (alcoholic addiction for example) one can make the conscious choice not to drink. Genetics by itself is not a life sentence to failure. It might make the journey a little more challenging though.

The debate among social and physical scientists regarding environment and genetic influencing factors on behavior will rage on however individuals can rest assured they are part their ancestors inheritance and part a product of their environment, but their final "product" of their being is based on life choices and self controlled action.